Drunkist

Slave Leia Pillow Fight

DrunkistIII — Wed, 01 Feb 2012 05:21:28 +0000

When I woke up this morning, I thought this R2D2 ski helmet would be the raddest Star Wars themed item of the day. Oh, was I ever wrong.

via Flickr (I would say NSFW, but then again I wouldn’t also work at a place that has a problem with a gallery of near naked Slave Leia ladies…you should probably just go ahead and quit)

Rating: 1.0/5 (1 vote cast)

26 Best Tweets from the #McDStories Fall Out

DrunkistIII — Fri, 27 Jan 2012 00:05:02 +0000

McDonald’s gets together with Twitter to promote the hashtag #McDStories, where some marketing dude assumed folks would tell heartwarming stories about America’s favorite restaurant. It didn’t work out. Note to corporations: Please don’t ever stop trying to use social media as a marketing tool.

Rating: 0.0/5 (0 votes cast)

Lobster Claw Naked Girl Homemade Craft Time

DrunkistIII — Mon, 23 Jan 2012 06:06:00 +0000

It would be less embarrassing to admit I was surfing for shellfish porn rather than the truth — I found this photo on Etsy, which is apparently a website that sells bizarre homemade art occasionally modeled by naked women.

That necklace costs $180. That’s the real takeaway here.

See more of this lady with no clothes wearing duck feather earrings, lobster claw bracelets, and sucking suggestively on a crab joint ring via Etsy.

Rating: 4.0/5 (1 vote cast)

FDR: American Badass

Drunkist — Sat, 21 Jan 2012 12:29:19 +0000

This might be one of the most important movies of our time. Please take some time right now and watch the trailer for this touching and compelling historical documentary, if only to answer one question: “does my cack still work?”

Thanks be to crotchbat.

Rating: 5.0/5 (1 vote cast)

Epic Xmas GIF is Epic

Drunkist — Fri, 16 Dec 2011 16:31:21 +0000

Thanks be to Upchurch.

Rating: 0.0/5 (0 votes cast)

Chick Punches Dude in Stomach: The Comments

Drunkist — Wed, 07 Dec 2011 16:27:33 +0000

C’mon Patience, fucking punch him! This is probably the lamest video of girls in bikinis I’ve ever seen, but once again YouTube’s commenters saved its bacon with their suave Internet sensibilities. Here are the Top 5 Comments, in no particular order:

“I liked the part where the drunk whore laughed and stumbled around”

“You’re stupid to think starting a fight with a black guy is gonna make any difference, you have to kill him and you have to do it swiftly, quietly and bury the body. Late at night after you’ve followed the person home, tranq them and most easily just bury them alive nearby. And for fuck sake wear gloves and a hairnet”

“The black guy should have just slapped the stupid out of her and get her fired up, then maybe she would have hit him.”

“i clicked this vid cause the thumbnail and i thought it said “Black guys punches white girl”

“i’d like to punch her in the cervix with my sausage!”

Rating: 0.0/5 (0 votes cast)

Best. Google Voicemail Transcript. Evar.

Drunkist — Wed, 19 Oct 2011 00:20:06 +0000

I just picked up my phone and saw that I had a voicemail from a number I didn’t recognize. I use Google Voice to capture my VMs and one of their features is voicemail transcription. I have gotten quite a few chuckles from their transcription services before, but this one is definitely the best. To give the service its due, it was definitely a pocket call and I couldn’t really understand what was being said either, since it sort of sounded like someone was trying to eat the phone.

Here’s the transcript for your reading pleasure:

Actually now that I’m reading it, I’m not sure whether to laugh my ass off or fear for my life, but please let me know if you can crack this Da Vinci code…

Rating: 2.0/5 (1 vote cast)

George Lucas Strikes Back

Drunkist — Thu, 15 Sep 2011 20:00:19 +0000

George Lucas + Oldboy = Everything suddenly makes sense.

George Lucas Strikes Back {HD Trailer} – YouTube.

Rating: 0.0/5 (0 votes cast)

Dr. Who Gets Racy

Drunkist — Fri, 02 Sep 2011 01:26:51 +0000

Nerd that I am, I’m not a huge Dr. Who guy. I remember watching it when I was a kid some, but it’s never caught on with me – maybe it’s his pacifism, or maybe it’s that scarf? Anyway, this video gave me some LOLz, what with the heady mix of geekery and prematurity, and I thought I’d share. [Thanks for the link, Crotchbat]

Rating: 2.5/5 (1 vote cast)

Saruman Gets Trololololled‬‏

Drunkist — Tue, 12 Jul 2011 15:18:25 +0000

I trolololo-love this video. Suck it Saruman.

Rating: 3.0/5 (1 vote cast)