A “VCR” was a magical device, similar to your “Blu-Ray” that allowed grainy pictures to display on your television. If you were lucky, your VCR had “Tracking +4″ so the picture never got squiggly and weird.
Never let anyone show you his “Manscorpion.” Seriously. And if someone does, tell an adult you trust right away.
This game, Dragonstrike, was never cool. Ever. In fact, even D&D players would have tried to beat you up for playing. Think about that.
Come to think of it, no game that involved the use of a VCR was ever cool. Period.
Black turtlenecks have always been cool, especially if you wear them in front of a black screen.
I don’t know much, but I do know this is the first goddamn Nic Cage movie I’ve wanted to see in about 20 years. First we had McLovin’ as a super hero, and now Hit Girl shoots people in the face and calls them cunts? I usually take Mark Millar’s books with a grain of salt – a big bloody grain of salt. I’m just hoping this doesn’t go the route of the Wanted movie and suck all the cool shit out of the original idea. And if there’s a goddamned Loom of Fate in this one I’m driving to Hollywood with nothing but adult diapers and shotguns in the trunk. (via Film School Rejects)
It’s funny because it’s not what they’re really saying. Though I could have missed the “Warp me to Halifax” Star Trek TNG episode, I suppose. But the real magic here is the occasional lapses in Zeppelin for no apparent reason. And the fact that Data says “Watch me eat 450 fucking hard boiled eggs.” That’s cool too. (Thanks for the link, Tom)
“Ah, Niko Bellic. 72 counts of vehicular homicide, 344 counts of firearm offenses, 25,719 counts of grand theft auto. You shot up a diner with an assault rifle. You blew up a school bus with a rocket launcher…Give up your weapons, and your body armor, and get the hell out of here.” What’s not to love about the Liberty City police department?
Cuz it’s hardcore! You throw eggs at birds! Keys make evil faces come out! This is not your grandfather’s Super Mario 2, that’s for sure! I only made it like halfway through this, but that’s probably because I only made it halfway through Super Mario 2…my secret shame. I do agree, however, that Toad gets all the girls. [via Geekologie]
Wow, these people are frickin’ crazy when it comes to the Simpsons. I’m just saying – all I did to prove my fandom was get a life-sized tattoo of Matt Groening on my back. But seriously, Ani-Manga Maggie pr0n? For shame, sirs. For shame. Luckily we have Swaim and high-pitched, slowed-down Gilbert Gottfried to get us through this video.
I suppose this video is worth watching for the Tupac joke alone, but the song’s damn catchy too. I can’t stop humming the chorus and imagining that I’m running away from Blinky, Pinky, Inky, and Clyde. [via b3ta]
Hey, I like comic books as much as the next guy (as long as “the next guy” is Comic Book Guy from the Simpsons) but I never realized just how much (creepy) rampant sex is in them. Thankfully, the gentlemen over at Cracked have set me straight. From Astro Boy’s oil changes, to Superman’s sex tape, to sex with a dinosaur, they’ve captured some good (and creepy) comic book loving.
There are 10 hot video game characters in that little link down there. You can keep your DOA volleyball girls, and your Lara Croft – I’m only including the one who’s made my stony little heart palpitate for the last 25 years or so. TLA Ms. Pac.
I’m not the most socially-apt dude on the planet, but I’m guessing that a kid who can solve two Rubik’s Cubes while playing Guitar Hero on Expert mode (nice version of Mr. Crowley btw) could use a few friends. That’s why instead of making fun of him I’m going to send him an Internet hug (and make fun of him offline).
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